I’ll go first…after 10 years of speculating in the market (read: gambling in high risk assets) I realized I shouldn’t ever touch a brokerage account in my lifetime. A monkey would have made better choices than I did. Greed has altered the course of life many times over. I am at an age where I may recover from my actions over the decades, but it has taken its toll. I am frugal and have a good head on me, but having such impulsivity in financial instruments was not how I envisioned my adulthood. Its a bitter pill to swallow, since money is livelihood of my family, but I need to “invest” all I have into relationships, meaningful moments, and fulfilling hobbies.
This is one thing you need to resolve. People pick up on this and it is self-sabotage. I bet you judge yourself far more harshly than anyone else does and things you think are bad about yourself no one even pays attention too.
As far as the other issues lots of people have dealt with it. You obviously need to move and I’d study what job opportunities are possible out there. I’d keep an open mind about what jobs I could do too. Save up what money you can to get a new place. I suspect you don’t have much stuff so the act of moving could be as easy as renting a u-haul. Jobs almost always will accommodate a new person if they need a few weeks to move if you tell them up front. Believe me, if I could do it anyone can.